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I am going to take a break now from writing and finish Bill Bryson’s I’m A Stranger Here Myself. Once again, Bryson hasn’t failed to make me laugh out loud several times. He makes the ordinary extraordinarily funny for me. He is a genius. I envy his abilities at times. After I finish it I am going to the library to pick up I Am Legend, a vampire tale that has been made into a movie with Will Smith.

Okay, I am reading now...

…Haggis. *Writing to self* Don’t forget this word. It is sheep intestine. You had a Braveheart Burger at some pub so old that Rob Roy used to drink there. The Braveheart Burger was like any other burger except the patty was made of Haggis.

A great quote. “To ensure that no one buys anything, they generally leave these sections unmanned. I believe there are whole floors at John Lewis of Oxford Street that have not seen a member of staff since just before the war.” Bryson on shopping for furniture in London. I realize this might not make any sense to you if you haven't been inside a John Lewis store, a Selfridges, or a Harrods, or, for that matter, been on Oxford Street. Sorry. I can't help you there.

“Where’s your primary shut-off then?”

“They forgot that, too.”

“You’re joking.”

“I wish I was.”

“Well, what would you do if you had a burst pipe?”

Now this I knew. First, I would hop around excitedly, going “Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!” as you might if, say, you looked down and unexpectedly found your legs on fire. Then I would try to stuff something like a sofa cushion into the leak, making it worse. Then I would hop about some more. Finally, I would dash out into the street and flag down passing vehicles.

…The above passage is Bryson’s imagined conversation with a washer repairman. Bryson absolutely fears confronting the handy man who knows Bryson doesn’t know anything about the problem, whether it be cars, appliances, or a computer. I have that same fear when it comes to cars.

…In the last chapter Bryson addresses why they moved to America from England.

There is a great deal about America that is deeply appealing. There are all the obvious things that outsiders always remark on—the ease and convenience of life, the friendliness of the people, the astoundingly abundant portions, the intoxicating sense of space, the cheerfulness of nearly everyone who serves you, the notion that almost any desire or whim can be simply and instantly gratified.

My problem was that I had grown up with all this, so it didn’t fill me with quite the same sense of novelty and wonder. I failed to be enchanted, for instance, when people urged me to have a nice day.

He goes on, but the whole of the last chapter was a fabulous end to another good Bryson tale.