Signed, "Dad"

13 February 2014    7:32pm

I just wrote on your first Valentine's Day card. I love what I wrote and I was doing great until I had to sign. I had never signed Dad before and it moved me to tears. It was such a powerful and unexpected moment and I felt I shared it with you even though I am here at home and you are a few miles away tucked into your isolette. 

A New Blog

No, I am not abandoning Six Hours on Sunday, born in 2005, but I have created a new blog for any writing I do on international relations (IR), politics, government, and current events (at least those with international consequences). I need a place to write where the theme is narrow, at least much narrower than Six Hours on Sunday has been thus far. 

So, I'll post on here when there is something up on my new blog. For now, you can head over to IR From Afar by following this link. Read the welcome post, in which I describe the inspiration behind the name of the blog. 

Thanks, ye few loyal readers. 

Bryce

Hike + Moose

Kate and I went on a hike yesterday. We saw a moose. I took pictures. 

Post-Grad Post

You know, I started this post with a little background information, but then I just reread this post from March 2011 when I got into grad school:

A writer’s ego is a very fragile thing. Sharing about the rejections over and over again, I felt like I was announcing through a large megaphone from the top of the world, “My writing sucks and no one likes it.” It’s hard to describe how that shattered my motivation and made me dislike—even hate—things completely unrelated to my attempt at getting into grad school.

I decided to stop with the background information after reading that. It is a painful story still and more painful that I occasionally dream about what it would have been like last week to walk across a stage and receive my MFA. But I did not. I received my MA in International Studies and spent the majority of my time at DU studying international security, the Middle East, and political theory. Apparently, I did pretty well at that. Grad school taught me a lot of things. A resounding lesson, for me, is that I can excel at something that is not my first, second, or even third passion. I can excel at something that I never thought I would excel at.

There is not much I have to say here. I loved my time at DU. I don’t want to appear ungrateful, but it just wasn’t an MFA program in writing. I kept telling myself over the last two years that I was at DU for a reason and that things will pan out, that this will all be worth it. That has yet to happen, so I’m still praying that it does. 

The Man Behind the Inspiration

Last weekend was a beautiful testament to a great man. I am humbled by how many lives my grandpa's life touched. His service and the weekend spent with family was exactly what he wanted. Below is what I wrote for my grandpa. He had the opportunity to have it read to him almost two months ago. It was important to me, and, I'm sure to him, that he heard it before he left this world. I read it aloud at his service on Saturday.

The Knot

I was young enough to not remember exactly when you taught me. But I was old enough to still be able to picture your hands confidently working the line in twists and loops. It is your hands I am fixated on. They look a good kind of worn, like a man’s hands should be, used and aged, but strong and capable. They are a work of art as you tie a knot you have tied so many times. Your attention to detail and your serious tone convey the importance of this lesson. I follow along and tie the knot a few times myself. The first time the knot does not take, but eventually, it holds true and strong.

The significance of this lesson did not fully register with me until some twenty years later when my father-in-law took me fishing. I hadn’t fished in a long time and I was worried that when we arrived at the shores of the Flaming Gorge Reservoir I would have to ask my father-in-law to tie the fishing knot. And he would have, without comment, because he is a gentleman, but a twenty-eight year old man should not have to ask for such things, whether he regularly fishes or not. So, I didn’t.

I took the fishing rod and reel he handed me along with a few lures down to the shore. Silently standing there, with the water lapping at the rocks, I threaded the line up through the tip of the rod and started the knot. My fingers moved like I had fished every day of my life since you first taught me all those years ago and the knot held fast as I checked its strength.

In minutes I was fishing the Gorge with a great man, but I was thinking of you. You, who knew that, whether I would fish every weekend of my life or just once a year, to tie a fishing knot was a necessary skill to have. And I knew it then, in a funny way, but clearer than ever, that I had passed a great test of manhood simply by tying a knot, by feeling capable, even for a fleeting moment. And that as important as teaching me how to tie a knot was, it was more important to teach me so that I might someday know how to teach my son or daughter so that they would learn from me as well as I have learned from you and, selfishly, that I might be remembered, as I remember you now.

A Man's Man

This weekend my entire family will be traveling to Fort Collins, Colorado to celebrate the life of my grandfather, Bryce Howard Neff. I was extremely close to him and I am honored to have the opportunity to speak at his memorial. I will share those words here on the blog after this weekend. For now, I will just say that I have always loved my name, not just because it is relatively uncommon, but because I am named after such a great, strong, capable man. He was a patriot, Air Force Captain, father, esquire, grandfather, great grandfather, a friend to countless people, an amazing storyteller, and a devoted and loving husband over nearly sixty-two years of marriage. Godspeed, Grandpa.

This is a picture of my grandpa (at right) when he was stationed at Iwakuni, Japan in 1950 and 1951 during the Korean War.

30!

I had an amazing time last night celebrating my 30th birthday with these great people! I am truly blessed by this circle of friends. 

An Incomplete Summary of 2012

I found a nice corner of a coffee shop a few days ago and wrote out a summary of 2012. Month by month, I put down what came to mind without the help of pictures or a calendar. Here is some of what I have.

January

Despite having a 6-week break between fall quarter and winter quarter I did not feel ready or excited to return to graduate classes at DU. Maybe it was the 26-27 books I had to read in the first ten weeks of the year. Maybe it was the realization, once again, that Korbel isn't an MFA program and thus, not where I truly wanted to end up. Or maybe it was the unease I have about going through all of this, accruing debt, and the inability to see how this is going to pay off. 

I remember ringing in the new year with my parents and having dinner at Bistro Vendome on NYE. We walked Larimer Square after dinner. It was around 20 degrees outside. We marveled at all the hoes lined up to get into clubs. Many were in mini-skirts and low-cut shirts, which conflicted with the sub-freezing temperature outside, but aided in what has become the goal of NYE for so many. Get dressed up. Go out. Get drunk. Meet someone. Go home and have sex with them. One can't be blamed for disliking much about NYE. 

February

I began the last year of my 20s. There was a joint birthday party in Fort Collins at my grandparent's house. My mom and my aunts were there. It was a good time. I missed my dad. 

March

We went to Kauai with Kate's parents. The trip provided so many moments that will be with me for a long time, but a few of them will be with me forever. One of the them was getting to Kauai ahead of the in-laws and exploring some of the island and our hotel with Kate. We took pictures of a beautiful sunset, had appetizers and drinks at the hotel bar and even had a nap before we had to go back to the airport to pick up her parents. 

I'll never forget snorkeling there even though it wasn't a great time to snorkel on the south shore. I dove down deep enough under the frothy surface and I kicked fast with fins directly toward the largest fish I saw. I surprised him and he bolted away and his tail made a noise that I could clearly hear. I didn't expect that. It was like a short burst of gunfire under water. I floated right there for a few seconds in silence watching the fish disappear into the murky distance. 

There was also a memorable attempt at boogie boarding at Brennecke's Beach, or break-neck beach. The waves here form very quickly, they are steep, and they dump you in shallow water. It's a horrible wave to ride. We tried a couple times, but I'm glad we stopped. One wave managed to take both Kate and I out. But before leaving a sea turtle popped up between Kate and I. It was just out of arm's reach. Kate's face was classic, scared, and proof of what was on her mind, "What the hell do we do now?"

April 

We drove to Farmington for Easter. My parents were overjoyed and we were too to see them and to have beautiful weather for the drive there and back. 

May

We went to Cincinnati for the first time. We were celebrating my college roommate's wedding. Cinci was pretty cool, which was surprising. However, I would never want to move to Ohio. I just couldn't do it. It's flat and boring for the most part. The summer air is sticky. Lots of fat people too.

Another couple of good friends were married this month too. I went to a bachelor party in Boulder. A shot of whiskey, bike rides into Boulder, Mountain Sun food and beer, and there were awkward moments in a shady basement club with a bunch of undergrads listening to Tom's story about how I was in the Olympics, but lesser known because Michael Phelps was a teammate. Then there was almost a scuffle with some very drunk people on Pearl St and a 3am bike ride back to north Boulder and a hard floor to call mine for the night. 

June

I finished my first year at DU. I spent way too much time planning our August vacation, but luckily, I made all the best choices. 

Kate and I celebrated five years of marriage with a dinner at Salt in Boulder. We found it underwhelming, but still good in some ways. It just didn't meet the reputation that precedes it.

It was a very hot month. The A/C went out twice. 

July

My DVR was getting overworked by recording 10-16 hours of Olympic coverage a day. I remained glued to the television for most of two weeks and reveled in Michael Phelps' performance, which started off a little rough, but by the end he had proven to the doubters that he still was the best swimmer in the world and certainly the most capable when it comes to performing on the world's greatest stage. 

August

I've written about our big trip elsewhere, but here's a little more about it. 

London: hot, muggy, crowded, expensive, tough to sift through all the thousands of restaurants to find a great one, but damn, I still love this city more than any other. 

Train ride: first class; I already had breakfast when we boarded, but I didn't know we were served breakfast on first class so I had another breakfast and the alcoholic beverages were on the house for the next four hours; leg room; cruising by the North Atlantic; Instagramming while on the train going 100+ mph.

Edinburgh: crowded, cool, damp, expensive, funny, but so awesome and old. Great dinner at the Dome. One great comedian. One not-so-great comedian. 

The Highlands: Stressful driving for both of us, but Kate did a great job, unbelievable mountains, glens, waterfalls, midges, dunking my head in a creek, watching Kate enjoy Scotland, the meals at the Lovat, Loch Ness, Balmuirfield House (our first B&B), the drive into Edinburgh, St. Andrew's golf course tour, and the sense of accomplishment and safety after turning in our rental car. 

London again: cooler this time around, Apex Temple Court (amazing hotel), lots of walking, and almost, in a way, getting a little tired of touristy London in the summer, chocolates from Selfridges, and a fitting service at St. Paul's and a great last dinner of dim sum at Ping Pong near the Jubilee bridge on the south side, and the priceless real food market in the same area. 

September

DU starts up again. Senioritis. SecDef...sucking. I'm not a social scientist. 

One bad football game in Laramie. Cowboys sucked again. But great company. 

A surprise trip to Vegas to meet Guy and Liron at the Venetian. We had a great time, but we both wanted one more night there. 

October

Kate interviews for a new job and gets it. 

I continued to slog through the fall quarter, feeling uninspired and bored by most of what I am studying. The Islamic political thought course is by far my favorite class of the quarter. 

November

Kate starts her new job. I finally finish the quarter at DU, getting three A-s, my worst quarter at DU so far. 

My parents come to Denver for a good long visit over Thanksgiving. Van Gogh exhibit. Ate a lot. Played Oh Hell quite a bit. Monte was here too. We saw Lincoln. 

And Obama wins again. I jump up from the couch, attempt to do the moonwalk across our wood floor, fail miserably, scream a little bit, peak into our bedroom where Kate is trying to fall asleep and I yell at her (out of joy), go back to the couch, collapse, sigh, one more yell, turned the TV off. 

December

We go to Dublin, California to spend time with my sister, her husband and family. Our niece had her 5th birthday party while we were out there. 

Kate's family is in town for Christmas. We tour Stranahan's. Eat at Sushi Sasa. The guys go to the Bull and Bush. 11pm service at Montview. I was moved in December. 

Kate and I close out the year at home with prime filet mignon, good wine, creamed spinach, and truffle mashed potatoes. It was probably better than any steak we could have ordered here in Denver. I stay up until midnight, but I'm in bed. Nevertheless, I still nudge Kate, sit up in bed, and yell, "Happy New Year!" Then, head to pillow and 2013.

Best of 2012

Best Vacation: Kauai was amazing, but Scotland and my favorite city in all the world with my wife…nothing can compete.

My favorite blog I wrote: This one, about Michael Phelps after the London 2012 games.

Best Meal: There were two and they happened at the same restaurant two nights in a row, The Lovat Brasserie in Fort Augustus, Scotland. Seriously, everything we bit into was mouth-rockingly wonderful. This place should not be missed if you’re in the Highlands.

Best Live Sporting Event: Front row at the Broncos vs. Browns game on December 23.

Best Televised Sporting Event: Michael Phelps' last show at this summer's Olympic games in London.

Best Bachelor Party: Sir Travis’ party in Boulder. Whiskey. Bikes. Mountain Sun. Pearl St. 3am bike ride back to north Boulder up some pretty steep hills.

Best Graduate Class: Tie….Great Books of the Middle East and Modern Islamic Political Thought. If it’s any consolation, the same professor taught them.

Best Photograph We Took: Kate probably disagrees, but I really love this one from Kauai. It's imperfect, but that's sort of what I like about it in addition to the stunning beauty of that wave and the memory I have of standing in ankle deep, frothy sea water while watching these waves roll in.

Best Drive: From Ft Augustus, Scotland to Portree, Isle of Skye, Scotland. I wanted to pull over every half mile to take more pictures.

Best Picture of Kate and I: This one taken by Jarrod Renaud.

Best Gift: One I gave.

Best Pet: Monte, my parents’ 16-yr-old cat, for being a trooper while she lived with us for 2.5 weeks when my parents were in Italy.

Best Thing To Do When The Wife Is Out Of Town: Invite over all your video-gaming friends for an all-day gaming bonanza with beers and bloody Marys.

Best Beer: Nothing new, but a beer I grew to love throughout this year, a beer that has easily become one of my favorites. Odell’s IPA.

Best Concert: Bon Iver at Red Rocks. This is easily the best concert I’ve seen since I was in high school and saw MxPx for the first time at the Ogden. The free Lumineers concert at DU was a very close second.

Best Laugh: With Guy Ferber in Las Vegas.

Best Sunset from 4550, our home: This October beauty.

Best Musical Discovery: M83 and the Lumineers.

Best Social Platform: Instagram.

Best Timing for a Photograph: This one by Kate. I didn't even say try to get one of me in the air and then she goes and snaps this perfectly framed and timed shot. Okay.

Best Coffee: Boxcar Coffee in Boulder. This place got me to like a cappuccino.

Fighting Resistance

A great friend and amazing photographer, family man, and God-lover, Jarrod Renaud, was interviewed by The Photographic Journal. Read his story. It's inspiring. 

The interview, click here.

Election Eve 2012

I have really missed being able to blog about this election season. The other day I looked back at how many blogs I was writing in 2008. It was a lot. On average 28-33 blogs per month leading up to and during the month of the election. 

I just went back and looked at my election live-blogging from 2008. I don't think I will be doing the same tomorrow, as I don't have the kind of audience that I did four years ago. Nor do I think I'll have much to say, but we'll see about that. 

I haven't read the live-blog from 2008 since, well, November of 2008, so there were definitely things I forgot about. Like this:

7:15pm - A CNN correspondent at the McCain celebration in Arizona says, "It is a much different mood here." Yeah, like a funeral. 

8:23pm - MSNBC calling Ohio for Obama. Self-protective denial is wearing very, very thin. And with that, Josh Marshall isn't live blogging anymore. He is "F--k Ya Blogging". Priceless. 

8:59pm - Via TPM, the Rocky Mountain News calling Colorado for Obama. [Remember the Rocky Mountain News?] 

9:23pm - The shots of Grant Park are extraordinary. I'm a little nervous about such a huge celebration. I hope people are smart and safe. I hope Obama is safe. Meanwhile in Arizona, it looks like a singalong for McCain fans. 

9:50pm - Fox calls Virginia for Obama. 10 minutes out from calling the whole race? Possibly. Tap the keg. Sullivan writes, "You drinking yet? Stupid question." 

10:00pm - Called it for OBAMA! OBAMA! OBAMA! OBAMA! I can't believe Americans just did that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

11:19pm - I've said all I can say at this point. What a night. What a night. All is not wasted. Goodnight.

I think what's clear about the election this year, is that we probably won't have the race called by 9pm Mountain Time, like it was in 2008. I have a busy day on Wednesday so I am not prepared to stay up very late tomorrow. I might have to call it quits at midnight if nothing has been called by then. But, if Obama would somehow manage to win Florida and Virginia or Florida and N.C., the race could easily be called by 9pm. However, that's extremely unlikely to happen. Even if Obama manages a victory in Florida, it'll be too close to call tomorrow. At least that's my view. Nevertheless, I remain hopeful for a called race sometime tomorrow evening. I still think this is a possibility because of Obama's appearing to hold on to Ohio, PA, N.H., Michigan, Wisconsin, Iowa, and maybe Virginia. If his margin of victory is great enough in those states for them to be called blue tomorrow night, then Obama will get his four more years. 

To me, the choice couldn't be clearer tomorrow. If you paid attention from 2001-2008, what makes you think returning to those policies is a good idea? That's what a Romney presidency is, a return to the past. The economy was in free fall when Obama took over. We were losing approximately 750,000 jobs a month at the time Obama moved into the White House. It took him some time, but he started to reverse that trend and he still is. It's a slow recovery and I understand some of the frustration out there. But I don't understand American impatience with the recovery. This impatience signals to me that these people never grasped the severity of the economic crisis. I generally don't understand American impatience with nearly everything anyways, but when it comes to the idea of just returning to the same old policies because four years of different policies haven't dug the country out of the deepest economic abyss it has seen since the 1930s is preposterous. This is to say nothing of Obama's other accomplishments like the Affordable Care Act (which actually does insure 30 million people who otherwise wouldn't have health insurance and who won't if Romney is elected and successfully repeals ACA, don't believe me? look it up), ending our atrocious, misguided war in Iraq, and concentrating on the only one that mattered and putting it to an end in Afghanistan, and killing Osama Bin Laden (something Bush had lost sight of ever since his obsession with Iraq truly took ahold of him in the wake of 9/11). 

I have never believed in a President who is going to solve all of your problems. No such President exists. And I think too much of America doesn't know that, which is certainly a contributing factor to the impatience I referenced above. However, I truly believe that there is an honest, caring man in Obama who cares for the greatest number of Americans, far more than Romney does. And because of this I am not choosing the lesser of two evils. 

I voted early last Friday for the man who has expressed deep and passionate concern for working-class Americans and their plight, who actually has the guts to ask for a tax increase for the very wealthiest in the country. If I was in that "wealthiest" category I would gladly accept the tax increase, but I'm not, and I don't feel bad for anyone in that tax bracket who would be asked to pay 3-4% more. 

I still believe in Obama. I don't believe a vote for Obama means a vote against America, but that's exactly the meme that the Right has pushed over the last two years of campaigning. This idea that America is becoming un-American, that our opportunities are slipping through our fingers, and that Romney represents the "true" American spirit is simply vacuous. 

I am hopeful for tomorrow and I believe there is clearly a right and a wrong choice on the ballot. I hope America makes the right one.

MSNBC, The Lumineers, and Mr. Potato...head?

Here are a few DU Debate Fest pictures from yesterday.

I'm not enforcing stereotypes here, but she was wearing an NRA hat.

Next door to the Romney table.

Mr. Potato Head....wait a minute.

Readying for Obama's arrival.

Secret Service and security taking some pictures before the Debate Fest gates open.

Martin Bashir broadcasting from DU, right in front of the Mary Reed Building.

Chris Matthews

More talking to cameras. I can't be the only one that always thinks of Bashir's interview with Michael Jackson when I see him. It's a classic. Here's the interview.

Let's play hardball!

The Lumineers put on an excellent show. 

A bass drum like the sun.

Mark Koebrich of 9News recording a segment during the Lumineers' concert.

America!